‘Day for the men’s leo btw, hamniambii kitu, ama mens tujisort!’ The herald cried in the group chat, and so the wishes came, albeit peppered with sentiments.
Now seated, sipping a mug of coffee as I check out the events calendar for this weekend, I can’t help but wonder how interesting that is. Earlier in the chat, it had struck me: why can’t men have goodwill wished upon them without asking?
One might say that we men don’t have to sup on recognition, nor hang on the coat of sentimental perks that society has to offer. However, it’s a paradox. As much as I, the modern man, am asked to be more tapped into my feelings, the same society, particularly ladies, abhors an emotionally vulnerable man.
“Why so?” I had asked.
“It’s up to you men to celebrate yourselves. We don’t have to celebrate you for you to recognize your worth. And besides, you live a surface-level life without depth,” Carol countered when I said men aren’t celebrated as much by society.
“And who built that society?” came Marianna. “You need to stop with the ‘what aboutism’ and start your own thing. Of course, we shall support your cause.”
Taken aback by the ladies’ sentiments about men lacking initiative, I looked across the table to Kit.
“Help me out, Kit. Are we really to blame?”
“You men need to learn to appreciate yourselves. It’s not that hard. Have you seen how us girlies do? Even on our birthday, it’s not just balloons on our profile — it’s literal balloons and brunches!” she said.
“And even more,” Carol added, “if you think back, I’m confident ninety percent of your fondest memories are from when a woman went out of her way to plan it. Am I wrong?”
As the conversation progressed, it dawned on me. Why aren’t we creating safe spaces for ourselves?
“For in most instances, you men tend not to share your predicaments. You’ve got to learn that listening equals communication. Besides just rumbling on and on in braggadocio, listen to your brother’s pain,” she added.
Listen to your brother, they say.
Now the weekend is here, and as fate would have it, Generali would be performing his stand-up show, A Time to Twist the Knife, at the Kenya National Theatre this evening. Getting a ticket to crack my ribs at his pain might just be the best way to cap it off.
